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Surprised by Oxford

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Carolyn Weber

August 2011

Cheryl Wright-Watkins

Carolyn Weber’s relationship with Oxford University began with a surprise when she received a letter in the mail announcing that she had won a full scholarship to pursue her post-graduate studies there. Without her knowledge, a professor had submitted her name for consideration for the scholarship. The book chronicles many more surprises that accompany Weber’s Oxford experience, most significantly her spiritual journey from cynical agnostic to evangelical Christian. Without a note of self-pity, Weber describes growing up in poverty with her mother and siblings after her father abandoned the family. A high-achieving student, she realized that through hard work she could improve her future prospects and become self-sufficient. Weber’s admission that she lied about her age on the application in order to qualify for her first job is particularly poignant following recollections of her family’s lavish lifestyle during her early childhood, before her father’s questionable business deals and resulting arrest doomed the family to financial devastation.

Carolyn Weber’s relationship with Oxford University began with a surprise when she received a letter in the mail announcing that she had won a full scholarship to pursue her post-graduate studies there. Without her knowledge, a professor had submitted her name for consideration for the scholarship. The book chronicles many more surprises that accompany Weber’s Oxford experience, most significantly her spiritual journey from cynical agnostic to evangelical Christian. Without a note of self-pity, Weber describes growing up in poverty with her mother and siblings after her father abandoned the family. A high-achieving student, she realized that through hard work she could improve her future prospects and become self-sufficient. Weber’s admission that she lied about her age on the application in order to qualify for her first job is particularly poignant following recollections of her family’s lavish lifestyle during her early childhood, before her father’s questionable business deals and resulting arrest doomed the family to financial devastation.

In addition to a large suitcase full of shoes, Weber recalls some of the baggage that she brought along to Oxford, including her feminist insistence on self-reliance, her distrust of men, her refusal to believe in a God whose existence she couldn’t scientifically or intellectually prove. Vivid descriptions of her father’s violent and erratic behavior during random and infrequent visits explain Weber’s cynicism about men, which intensifies her reluctance to adopt a patriarchal religion.

The book’s title acknowledges C. S. Lewis’s memoir, Surprised by Joy, and includes several quotes from Lewis, his work, and other works of literature, a technique that highlights the writer’s knowledge of classical literature and lends an intellectual flair to the book. She includes contemporary popular song lyrics, adding to the book’s approachability. Weber was frequently irritated when she was unable to “unhear the good news” of the gospel once she heard it: “It is like a great big elephant in a tiny room.” She engages readers through wit and humor, such as the passage in which she describes dragging her heavy luggage through Oxford’s cobblestone streets, “I brought many shoes. I had no idea at the time of the significance of all these soles accompanying me.”

Many of Weber’s Oxford classmates and professors were devout Christians, and the writer recalls numerous conversations that fueled her curiosity about God. One of her first encounters at Oxford was with an American theology student who urged her toward Christianity and whose “unwavering tone of patience, respect, and kindness spoke to me more than all the syllogisms or intellectual arguments put together.” Throughout the book, Weber calls this man “TDH” (Tall, Dark, Handsome) or the “son of a preacher man.” She hints at her romantic interest in him in an early reference that is accompanied by lyrics from Dusty Springfield’s song that declares, “The only one who could ever reach me was the son of a preacher man.” The writer reveals in the epilogue the vital role that this man, who played a pivotal role in her conversion, has played in her life since she left Oxford.

As a metaphor to illustrate her internal debate over whether or not to accept God, Weber, who admits to having a poor sense of direction, recounts several examples of getting “lost,” a word also used by Christians to describe the spiritual condition of non-Christians. She often relays her thoughts as quotations to reflect the confusion and internal conflict that weighed heavily on her while she contemplated Christianity.

Weber reveals in the preface that, like most memoirs, “most names have been changed, some features altered, and a few natures, at times, have been collapsed into one,” and in the epilogue she acknowledges the passage of seventeen years between her Oxford graduation and her writing this book. These admissions bring into question the veracity of the many pages of dialogue. The benefit of unfolding her story in scene is that the reader feels as though he/she has personally witnessed the painful path to Weber’s eventual conversion.

A teacher once told Weber that “anything not done in submission to God, anything not done to the glory of God, is doomed to failure, frailty, and futility.” Her book reads like a prayer of thanksgiving for the infectious joy that she found through Christianity. This is a book for Christians, for those exploring Christianity, and for those wrestling with their faith.

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